Life is tough, and it gets tougher every breath we take, but for every individual breath, life also gets better.. The more we try, the more we push along even in our darkest of times, the more rewarding life becomes.
It truly shocks me how people either don’t care about others struggling, or they simply are too scared to stand out from the crowd, and some will just laugh instead to make you struggle with life even more.
“Learning the Game” by Buddy Holly is such a great song with such a true message. We will have our hearts broken more than once, we will have our hearts played with more than once. We likely will be cheated on more than once by another lover. Yea, cheating and heart playing is not a very very forgiving thing, but at the end of the day, it’s their loss.
Self harm really just isn’t understood. Some people think we want to self harm, think we want to die, think we have no hope in us. Self harm is just like when you get the urge to lust, it’s just like when you get the urge to smoke (I don’t smoke but I understand what it’s like), or to have a drink/snack that you told yourself you aren’t going to have.
We all have scars, a history we cannot bear, but we need to put that behind us. And we all get judged by something that cannot be changed, but we need to just ignore those judges.We constantly feel we aren’t good enough, and we lose courage, and hope and faith in simply what the truth is. Others forever tear us down, even those that did it unintentionally and unknowingly, and it just hurts so so bad.
Today, (14th October 2013) one of my friends, he was talking about retaliating or something like that, I can’t remember, and he asked me something like why not retaliate? And I said “you know I’m against violence, and so are you”, and he said to me “don’t tell me you’re against violence when you remember what you did to your wrist”. This was in class too!
Sometimes in life, bad things happen and sometimes in life, those bad things cost us lives. Sometimes it is our fault, other times it is not, but no matter what, we always seem to blame ourselves. We blame ourselves for even trying and are mad at our mistakes. We blame ourselves for breaking hearts, and we blame others for breaking ours. It hurts, it hurts bad, and it gets harder every single time.
For me, lately it’s been the knife that I been resorting to. (not literally a knife, but what the knife represents) I’ve felt just so weak the past few weeks, I’ve been getting quite stressed, and I’ve just been completely ignoring the things I have written here on my blog and my Instagram account.